Monday, 7. October 2013
You need to be special. I need to be special. We need to be special. They need to be special. People who are only moderately successful in life need to feel special. Awful people need to feel special. Ordinary people need to be special. Internet trolls need to feel special. Old ladies need to feel special. Your dentist needs to feel special. Even the homeless guy who won’t sully his purity by talking to anyone, even he needs to feel special. And he’s willing to pay a lot higher price than we are to get there. In fact the less special you are the harder you’ll be working inside yourself to try to feel very special, which burns a lot of energy and probably prevents you making your mark in life by achieving something that actually matters to the world. Hence everyone works mostly on perfecting how they feel, which cannot be achieved by working on how they feel… and meanwhile the world narrowly avoids collapse and catastrophe most of the time as good things only happen by accident on someone’s quest to feel special by being a great inventor, very rich, a magnificent leader, an immortal creator, a veritable saint or the mother of two nicely brought up children who don’t really have a problem with dyslexia.
Special is a charmed place that exists outside the normal rules of life, the normal rules being that everything that glistens will quickly tarnish and may even poison you or take revenge. Everyone will plot behind your back and all hopes will turn to bitterness. Then you’ll get sick, rot away, go mad and slowly die, leaving nothing much behind. Special is the opposite of that, which is why we want it so badly. It’s a place of safety from the normal rules of life.
Special can be different for everyone, of course it can; it wouldn’t be as really really special, as specially special as you are, if it couldn’t be unique. I’m not saying you’re boring or predictable but your special may well include some of the following: it will be safe, plus warm (usually), comforting, reliable, enduring, never invaded by storms or monsters, killers, plagues or people who are even more special than you are (rich, talented, loud, bullies, men, men with bigger dicks, celebs and others who may put you in your place or the truly, historically famous who are bound to make your feel some limitations). In your special place you will be number one and everything will adore you. Your word will be law and lore as well. As you have matured in life people close to you have been touched by your specialness and it is quite possible that the people in your family, your clan, your group, your team, your race, your religion and your opinion-forming clique will have to be rather special, too. Certainly the people you created, your posssible dyslexics who are too gifted for their teachers to understand, they are definitely bound to be very special. Until the divorce, when they’ll become a drag and you can concentrate on new ways of being special.
To be continued…